Fight Fair

Today’s reading in The Love Dare is about fighting fair. It talks about establishing boundaries or ground rules for when disagreements occur. Learning to ‘fight fair’ is an important part of preserving a marriage. Some of the most hurtful and damaging things have been said to me in the heat of the moment, the words themselves hurt, but the volume with which they were delivered and the hate in my partners eyes is something that I’m still trying to erase from my memory. Physical wounds heal much easier than those emotional cuts.

It is suggested to establish “WE” rules and “ME” rules. In other words, establish rules that you both agree with, and your own personal rules on how you will treat your spouse when conflict arises.

“Everyone must be quick to hear, slow to speak and slow to anger” (James 1:19)
“A gentle answer turns away wrath, but a harsh word stirs up anger” (Proverbs 15:1)

The Fireproof movie is out in theaters now. I encourage you to check your local listings and see if it’s playing nearby. Go by yourself, with a group of friends, or with your partner. I truly believe this movie could start a fresh wave of commitment and renewal in marriages around the world. I know it’s helped spur me on to really examining and looking at what went right and what went wrong in my past relationships, and hopefully gives me a chance to heal and change before moving forward into another relationship. After all, those who don’t learn from history are bound to repeat it.